Fargo (1996)

• the Coen Brothers' masterpiece was a self-proclaimed "homespun murder story"; it defied categorization by being a conglomerate: a film noir (with stark white vistas and backdrops), a satirical comedy, a suspenseful crime drama, and a violent mystery thriller; the film's story could be boiled down to a kidnapping gone awry, a triple homicide (a highway patrolman and two innocent passersby), two contrasting families (the male-dominated Lundegaards and the female-dominated Gundersons), the corruptible effects of fast food, TV watching and pecuniary greed, and a hapless extortion scheme
• in the opening credits sequence set in January of 1987, images (beautifully filmed by Roger Deakins) were of a frozen, snow-blanketed Fargo, ND and a car (with a new tan Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera in tow) emerging in the white-out blizzard conditions and making its way along the deserted highway, toward an inn (with a bar and restaurant)

Car Salesman: Jerry Lundegaard (William H. Macy)

Two Hired Kidnappers: (l to r): Carl and Gaear

• the desperate, financially-impotent, disheveled and indebted Jerry Lundegaard (William H. Macy), executive sales manager of a car dealership, met up inside with two low-life losers (and soon-to-be hired killers): Carl Showalter (Steve Buscemi) - a talkative, slimeball, nervous and embittered individual, and Gaear Grimsrud (Peter Stormare) - a violent, tall, blonde, psychotic, quiet and grim man prone to outbursts; he offered them the new tan Cutlass Ciera and cash ("the new vehicle plus forty thousand dollars") to kidnap his own wife, Jean Lundegaard (Kristin Rudrüd) in their home in Minneapolis, MN; she was the daughter of Wade Gustafson (Harve Presnell) who owned Jerry's car dealership Gustafson's Motors; the ransom demand was to be for $80,000, to be split 50% between the kidnappers and Jerry after the ransom was paid (and the wife was safely returned without bloodshed)
• in reality, Jerry's ill-conceived real-estate plan was to swindle and extort the funds out of his detested, wealthy, businessman father-in-law; his idea was to ask for a loan of $750,000 to build a 40-acre parking lot in Wayzata
• Jerry's devious character was illustrated in a scene where he browbeat and scammed customers at the dealership - husband and wife (Gary Houston and Sally Wingert) were pressured to pay $500 more for TruCoat sealant for their new car purchase
• it was also implied that Jerry was embezzling money from the car dealership and also falsifying car sales documents in order to fill in the gaps of the depleted dealership bank accounts; a lucrative real-estate deal with his father-in-law was in jeopardy, thus motivating and prompting Jerry to hatch the kidnapping scheme
• the two kidnappers stopped for the night at the Blue Ox Truck Stop and Hotel in Brainerd, MN where they had hired two prostitutes; after vigorous sex, the two sat up in bed in their icy blue-tinged room, catatonically watching the Tonight Show
• after hiring the two killers, Jerry learned that the real-estate deal with his father-in-law was approved, and he decided to call off his two hired thugs for the unnecessary kidnapping, but mindlessly, he realized that he had no way to contact them and abort the scheme; Jerry's original plan of acquiring $750,000 was scratched, and he was promised only a finder's fee of $75,000 dollars, plus Wade announced that he would independently process the deal without Jerry's involvement; Jerry was so upset by the news that he expressed his frustrated rage on his frozen windshield with an ice scraper
• meanwhile, at the Lundegaard residence, masked intruder Carl with a crowbar and Gaear approached the house and broke in; Jean fled to the upstairs to try to escape through a second-story window in the locked bathroom; however, she was found by Gaear hiding in the bathtub; she screamed and fled down the hallway, tripped, and ended up unconscious after falling down the flight of stairs

Triple Murder and Mayhem by Gaear
State Trooper Who Accosted Them Shot
Two Witnesses Who Happened to Drive By Also Executed

• that night, while transporting Jean covered in a blanket in the back seat of the Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera to a cabin by Moose Lake, the kidnappers were stopped by a State Trooper (James Gaulke) asking for license and registration information; when the officer became suspicious after hearing whimpering sounds, Gaear in the passenger seat reached over and grabbed the cop's hair, slammed his head into the car door, grabbed a gun from the glove compartment and blew the trooper's brains out; as Carl attempted to dispose of the body, another car with two passengers drove by and witnessed the murder scene; after Gaear pursued the car, it turned over in a ditch; he walked up to the two victims, and saw the male driver (J. Todd Anderson) running in the snow and shot him dead, and then returned to the car to execute the injured female (Michelle Suzanne LeDoux) in the car
• early the next morning, 7 months-pregnant Brainerd Chief of Police Marge Gunderson (Frances McDormand) was introduced having breakfast with her loving husband Norm (John Carroll Lynch) in her home; she was hurrying on her way to a triple homicide crime scene on the road near Brainerd, MN; at the site of the witness' deaths, she quickly surveyed everything and correctly surmised what had happened - and also stated how the perpetrator was a "big fella"; then, she was seen doubled over and bent down, supporting herself on her knee as her morning sickness overwhelmed her - instead of the tragedy of the roadside triple murder - she stated: "I just think I'm gonna barf...it's just morning sickness"; at the scene of the trooper's death, she noticed different sized prints for a second perpetrator; from the dead trooper's citation book with notes at 2:18 am, she guessed that the car was pulled over because it had Dealer plates (DLR) that had not been exchanged
• shortly later, in an offbeat scene at the Lakeside Club in Brainerd, Marge interrogated two dim-witted hookers (Larissa Kokernot and Melissa Peterman), employed as strippers at the bar who had been "company" for the two suspects driving a tan Cutlass Ciera with dealer plates the evening before the two shootings; when she asked what the suspects looked like, one of the women described a "funny lookin'" uncircumcised male: ("The little guy was kinda funny-lookin'...I don't know. Just funny-Iookin'...I couldn't really say. He wasn't circumcised"); Marge was astonished and asked again: "Was he funny-lookin' apart from that?"; the second fella was described as "a little older - he looked like the Marlboro Man" who smoked alot; they were allegedly on their way to the Twin Cities
• the walls began to close in on Jerry as all of his planned schemes began to collapse: (1) a distressed Carl called Jerry and reported three people dead in Brainerd, and demanded the entire ransom of $80,000 the next day, and (2) the GMAC representative (voice of Warren Keith) demanded Jerry send proper VIN numbers for a group of vehicles immediately or he would report him to the company's legal department, and (3) Jerry told Wade that the ransom amount was $1 million, and Wade insisted that he personally deliver the money rather than have Jerry be the go-between, and (4) burly Native American mechanic Shep Proudfoot (Steve Reevis), who worked at Jerry's dealership service garage, was suspected of being in contact with the kidnappers (he was Jerry's middleman with the killers) and thereby had become an accessory to the Brainerd murders; realizing he was in deep trouble, he looked up Carl (who was having sex with a hooker) and mercilessly beat him
• during a deadly money-drop exchange of a briefcase on the roof of Minneapolis' Radisson Hotel parking garage, the aggravated kidnapper Carl was surprised to see Wade instead of Jerry; Wade demanded to see his kidnapped daughter Jean before handing over the money; surprised by the stringent demands, Carl shot Wade in the abdomen; as Wade was dying, he shot Carl in his right jaw and cheek; screaming in pain, Carl put more bullets into Wade, grabbed the briefcase, and drove toward the garage gate; passing Carl on his way up to the rooftop was Jerry, who found Wade's body on the ground; he placed the body in his trunk and then exited, realizing to his horror that Carl had also shot the attendant and smashed through the wooden exit gate

Bloody and Deadly Money-Drop Scene Between a Dying Wade and Carl	Jerry Realizing to His Horror the Magnitude of His Botched Schemes
Injured Carl Hiding Excess Ransom Money in Snowy Field

• on the way back to the cabin to rendezvous with Gaear, Carl realized he had $1 million dollars in the briefcase rather than the $80,000 dollars promised; he greedily decided to keep the excess money for himself, and buried it deep in the snow next to a fence
• after having briefly questioned car salesman Jerry earlier in the film, Marge returned to interrogate the smarmy and snippy Jerry in his autosales office, who evasively resisted her continued line of questioning about a tan Cutlass Ciera stolen from the lot: ("Ma'am, I answered your question. I answered the darn... I'm cooperating here, and there's, there's no, uhm...Well, heck! If you wanna, if you wanna play games here. I'm workin' with ya on this thing here, but, OK, I'll do a damn lot count...Yah, right now. You're darned tootin'. If it's so damned important to ya") - he then fled from the showroom, and she shockingly realized: "Oh, for Pete's sake, he's fleeing the interview! He's fleeing the interview!" when she saw suspect Jerry escaping in a car outside the auto dealership
• once the badly-injured Carl met up with Gaear again at the remote Moose Lake cabin, he was bleeding profusely; he discovered that his insane and psychotic partner Gaear had brutally murdered Jean to keep her quiet; they bickered bitterly over splitting the $80,000 money and also dividing up the vehicle - the Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera; Carl insisted on leaving with the car in his possession, as extra compensation for his facial injury; as he left, he was attacked by Gaear from behind, who swung an axe overhead into Carl's neck, like the proverbial Paul Bunyan
• in the infamous body disposal scene outside the cabin, Marge happened to spot the tan Ciera vehicle parked in front of a cabin at Moose Lake; she approached cautiously and slowly edged her way around the lakeside cabin to discover Grimsrud supplying his wood chipper with the body of his kidnapping accomplice Carl with only one shoeless leg/foot left to be shredded; a red swatch of blood was being propelled from one end of the chipper onto the white snow; when she called out "Police!", Gaear fled onto the icy lake; she trained her gun at him, fired and missed, but then struck him in the right leg; he fell to the snowy surface, grasping at his wounded thigh

With Gun Drawn, Marge Approaching Gaear	Gaear Feeding Accomplice Carl into a Wood Chipper

• with her mute and motionless captured murderer/kidnapper Gaear handcuffed in the back of her police car, Marge chastised the criminal, expressing her weariness, disappointment, and bitterness; she lectured him and scoffed at the kidnappers' senseless and greedy motivations ("for a little bit of money"): ("So that was Mrs. Lundegaard on the floor in there. And I guess that was your accomplice in the wood chipper. And those three people in Brainerd. And for what? For a little bit of money. There's more to life than a little money, you know. Don't you know that? And here ya are, and it's a beautiful day. Well, I just don't understand it")
• two days later, Jerry was arrested by two state policemen in a motel room outside of Bismarck, ND; his effort to escape out the bathroom window in his underwear failed miserably as he was apprehended
• in the satisfying epilogue between Marge and her husband Norm, he calmly told her that he had won a design contest for the 3 cent stamp; Marge complimented him about how more people used the three cent stamp rather than the 29 cent stamp; both of them anticipated a hopeful future: ("We're doing pretty good...Two more months...")

Father of the Bride (1950)

• director Vincente Minnelli's and MGM's satirical domestic comedy was about a wedding ceremony, including the difficult preparations and rites of matrimony, and the travails and joys of a harrassed father experiencing his only daughter's expensive wedding:
• in the opening scene, harrassed and exhausted father, well-to-do lawyer Stanley T. Banks or "Pops" (Oscar-nominated Spencer Tracy), talked directly to the camera to deliver a voice-over narration; collapsed in a chair, he looked back at the extravagant marriage ceremony that had just occurred; he told about all the stresses before (and after) a lavish June wedding for his beautiful 20 year-old daughter Kay (Elizabeth Taylor), and his recollections of how she had grown up so fast to become engaged: ("I would like to say a few words about weddings. I've just been through one. Not my own, my daughter's. Someday in the far future, I may be able to remember it with tender indulgence, but not now. I always used to think that marriage was a simple affair. Boy and girl meet, they fall in love, get married, they have babies. Eventually the babies grow up, meet other babies, and they fall in love and get married, and so on and on and on. Looked at that way, it's not only simple, it's downright monotonous. But I was wrong. I figured without the wedding")
• the film's lengthy flashback told the witty and contrived story of the previous three months leading up to the wedding, as Stanley realized that his 'little girl' Kay was soon to be leaving in anticipation of her marriage ("All I could think of was a little girl in brown pigtails and dirty overalls")
• Stanley desired to "get a peek at this Superman," his daughter's fiancee, Buckley Dunstan (Don Taylor) from the front window, and had a pained reaction
• in the middle of the night, Stanley frantically worried to his wife Ellie (Joan Bennett) about Kay's choice of a fiancee: "We don't know a thing about him. Not a darn thing. Not where he comes from, what he makes, or what he makes making it"
• they had a lengthy, one-sided "man-to-man" financial talk (three months before the nuptials) to determine if Buckley could suitably support Kay
• during the required meeting of the Banks to get to know the wealthy in-laws the Dunstans, Herbert or "Herbie" (Moroni Olsen) and Doris Dunstan (Billie Burke), Stanley admitted: "We did more bare-faced lying in those few minutes than we had done in our entire lives"
• in the scene of the Banks' party to announce the engagement, Stanley found himself confined to the kitchen and was unable to deliver his prepared speech
• Stanley became exasperated about the exorbitant costs and how everyone else was spending his money, but soon realized he would lose the battle for a small wedding: "From then on, I was a dead duck"
• Stanley was completely flabbergasted by the amount of clothing being purchased for the event, and all of the other included expenses: ("It's only two syllables from Banks to bankruptcy...What are people gonna say when I'm in the gutter because I tried to put on a wedding like a Roman emperor?"); eventually, Stanley gave in to the entire guest list
• Stanley faced his daughter's overbearing caterers, led by fussy caterer Mr. Massoula (Leo G. Carroll): ("An experienced caterer can make you ashamed of your house in 15 minutes")
• once the RSVPs for the invitations began to arrive, Stanley was dismayed by the many positive responses
• then, Kay abruptly announced that "the wedding's off" during a sudden explosion of emotion, after Buckley impulsively proposed that the couple go on a fishing trip in Nova Scotia for their honeymoon; Buckley arrived to sincerely apologize for his awful and selfish lack of judgment with Kay; Stanley was forced to intercede after the couple's fight and make things right between the feuding couple, and the two quickly reconciled their differences
• during the botched church rehearsal for the wedding arrived, the groom Buckley and the minister Rev. Galsworthy (Paul Harvey) were absent from the proceedings, and the rehearsal run by the minister's assistant Mr. Tringle (Melville Cooper) was totally disorganized and chaotic
• the night before the wedding, Stanley also experienced a nightmarish vision of what might happen at a disastrous wedding (he imagined himself appearing late, in tatters, and not able to walk down the springy and rubbery aisle, as his daughter screamed at him from the altar)
• once he awoke from the nightmare during a midnight snack kitchen scene, he visited with his daughter as they shared a bottle of milk and sandwiches; she confessed her fears about the monumental wedding about to occur, and then complimented her father: "Nothing ever fazes you, does it?"
• the day of the wedding dawned with massive distractions and confusion over preparations in the house for the reception, including collisions between caterers setting up and movers taking out the furniture; however, Stanley then saw his daughter in her wedding gown, reflected in a triple-paned full-length mirror ("She looked like the princess in a fairy tale") - it was a wonderfully visualized moment
• as Stanley played his part to give Kay away, he felt ambiguity and confusion about losing his only daughter: ("What's it going to be like to come home and not find her. Not to hear her voice calling 'Hi Pops' as I come in. I suddenly realized what I was doing. I was giving up Kay. Something inside me was beginning to hurt")
• the film concluded with the chaotic reception back at the Banks home; missing her throughout the entire reception in the crowded house, in the midst of the hubbub and catering staff and the crush of the hordes of guests, Stanley failed to see the throwing of Kay's bouquet from the front indoor staircase, and only caught a glimpse of her departing in the newlyweds' car. Crestfallen, he thought to himself (in voice-over): "She was gone. My Kay was gone. And I'd been too late to say goodbye to her." Later after the last guests departed, Stanley surveyed the "wreckage" in the house with Ellie, and suddenly felt how empty the house had become
• in a concluding tearjerking scene, Kay made a post-wedding phone call (from the NY train station on her way to her Nova Scotia honeymoon) to lovingly say 'thank you' to her father: ("And Pops, you've been just wonderful. I love you. I love you very much. Bye bye")
• Stanley delivered a memorable last line: ("Nothing's really changed, has it? You know what they say: 'My son's my son until he gets him a wife, but my daughter's my daughter all of her life.' All of our life")

Ferris Bueller's Day Off (1986)

• director John Hughes' cult comedy hit was about one high school student's one last day of cutting class (after faking illness) and enjoying life on the streets of Chicago
• in the opening scene, malingering rich-kid, trouble-making student Ferris Bueller (Matthew Broderick) described (with graphics) how to fool parents and skip a day of school at Shermer High: ("The key to faking out the parents is the clammy hands. It's a good non-specific symptom. I'm a big believer in it. A lot of people will tell you that a good phony fever is a dead lock, but, uh, you get a nervous mother, you could wind up in a doctor's office. That's worse than school. You fake a stomach cramp, and when you're bent over, moaning and wailing, you lick your palms. It's a little childish and stupid, but then, so is high school. Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it"); he had cleverly set up his Emulator II+ synthesizer to deliver convincing fart and vomit sound effects
• after showering (with his hair wrapped inside a towel spiral on his head), Ferris continued his monologue - breaking the 4th Wall and speaking to the camera/audience: ("It's not that I condone fascism or any 'ism' for that matter. Ism's, in my opinion, are not good. A person should not believe in an 'ism,' he should believe in himself. I quote John Lennon: 'I don't believe in Beatles. I just believe in me.' A good point there. After all, he was the walrus. I could be the walrus. I'd still have to bum rides off of people")

Economics Teacher: "Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?"

Bueller's Empty Chair in Classroom

Economics Student Simone: "Uhm, he's sick..."

• Ferris' Economics teacher (Ben Stein) monotonously called student names alphabetically from his attendance roll, and repeatedly asked for "Bueller? Bueller? Bueller?..."; there was a view of Ferris' empty chair, and fellow student Simone Adamley (Kristy Swanson) gave a confused excuse about how Ferris was sick: ("Uhm, he's sick. My best friend's sister's boyfriend's brother's girlfriend heard from this guy who knows this kid who's going with the girl who saw Ferris pass out at 31 Flavours last night. I guess it's pretty serious"); she responded to his thank you with the oft-quoted, cheerful: "No problem whatsoever"
• and shortly later, the Economics teacher delivered a boring lecture to his half-asleep students on the Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act, when he repeatedly paused for them to fill in the blank answer: ("Anyone? Anyone?"): "In 1930, the Republican-controlled House of Representatives, in an effort to alleviate the effects of the --- Anyone? Anyone? --- the Great Depression, passed the --- Anyone? Anyone? The tariff bill? The Hawley-Smoot Tariff Act? Which, anyone? Raised or lowered? --- raised tariffs, in an effort to collect more revenue for the federal government. Did it work? Anyone? Anyone know the effects? It did not work, and the United States sank deeper into the Great Depression. Today we have a similar debate over this. Anyone know what this is? Class? Anyone? Anyone? Anyone seen this before? The Laffer Curve. Anyone know what this says? It says that at this point on the revenue curve, you will get exactly the same amount of revenue as at this point. This is very controversial. Does anyone know what Vice President Bush called this in 1980? Anyone? Something D-O-O economics. Voodoo economics"
• in the office of Dean of Students Ed Rooney (Jeffrey Jones), he explained how dangerous Ferris was: ("I don't trust this kid any further than I can throw him...What is so dangerous about a character like Ferris Bueller is he gives good kids bad ideas...The last thing I need at this point in my career is 1500 Ferris Bueller disciples running around these halls. He jeopardizes my ability to effectively govern this student body")
• but then, Dean Rooney's secretary Grace (Edie McClurg) explained how popular Ferris was: ("He makes you look like an ass is what he does, Ed...Oh, well, he's very popular, Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wasteoids, dweebies, dickheads - they all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude")
• Ed Rooney received what he believed was a crank phone call from Ferris, but it was actually made by Ferris' friend Cameron Frye (Alan Ruck), who was impersonating Ferris' cheerleader girlfriend Sloane's (Mia Sara) 'father' Mr. Peterson - it was a fake request to excuse Sloane from school due to the grandmother's death, so that Sloane could join the two guys for a day off in downtown Chicago; Rooney was fooled into delivering a sarcastic and insulting response: ("Tell you what, dips--t, you don't like my policies you can just come on down and smooch my big ol' white butt!...Pucker up, buttercup!"); and then, he received another phone call announced by Grace: ("Ferris Bueller's on line two...")
• Ferris impersonated Sloane's father when he picked up his girlfriend Sloane from the front of the school, driving Cameron's father's 'borrowed' 1961 red Ferrari 250 GT convertible - while he was suspiciously watched from afar by Rooney standing on the school steps; Ferris asked Sloane: "Do you have a kiss for Daddy?" - and engaged in a long, deep and passionate kiss - to Rooney's consternation
• the foolhardy Rooney attempted to catch Ferris at home, where he was confronted by the slobbering family Rottweiler - and then by Ferris' sister Jeanie (Jennifer Grey) who was also skipping class and had returned home; when Jeanie came face-to-face with Rooney in the kitchen, thinking he was a prowler, burglar or rapist, she karate-kicked him in the face three times, and then ran upstairs to hide in her bedroom and call the police; while Rooney fled, the police arrived and arrested her for making a prank call and filing a false report

Police Station Conversation
Ferris' Resentful Sister Jeanie (Jennifer Grey)	Garth Volbeck, Boy in Police Station (Charlie Sheen)

• after being brought to the police station, Jeanie reluctantly engaged in a conversation with drugged-up juvenile delinquent stranger (Charlie Sheen), about her frustrations with Ferris always getting away with things: ("All right, you want to know what's wrong?...In a nutshell, I hate my brother. How's that?...See, I went home to confirm that the s--thead was ditching school and when I was there, a guy broke into the house. I called the cops, and they picked me up for making a phony phone call...Why should he get to ditch when everybody else has to go?"); when he offered advice: ("Your problem is you...You ought to spend a little more time dealing with yourself, a little less time worrying about what your brother does - that's just an opinion"), she snapped back: ("What are you, a psychiatrist?... Why don't you keep your opinions to yourself?"); his suggestion that she speak to someone (possibly Ferris!) brought a threat: ("If you say Ferris Bueller, you lose a testicle"), and he replied: "Oh, you know him?" - she clenched her fist; however, when Jeanie's mother arrived to pick her up, she was making out with Garth
• Ferris' cute, sun-glasses wearing girlfriend Sloane Peterson (with Ferris and Cameron ducking down to hide) sent a mouthed Hi and Kiss to Ferris' father Mr. Bueller (Lyman Ward) who had done a double-take - he was seated in the back seat of a nearby taxi-cab also caught in traffic; when Ferris asked what his father was doing, Sloane exaggerated: "He's licking the glass and making obscene gestures with his hands" - before she broke into hysterics
• as the film's title stated, Ferris Bueller's Day Off from high school was spent in downtown Chicago with his friends Cameron Frye and girlfriend Sloane; they visited many typical sites, including a Cubs' Wrigley Field baseball game, the Sears Tower, the Chicago Art Institute, and the Chicago Mercantile Exchange
• atop a Von Steuben Day parade float, Ferris made an unexpected announcement: ("Ladies and gentlemen, you're such a wonderful crowd, we'd like to play a little tune for you. It's one of my personal favorites and I'd like to dedicate it to a young man who doesn't think he's seen anything good today - Cameron Frye, this one's for you"); after the lip-synching of Wayne Newton's Danke Schoen, Ferris segued into the playing and lip-synching of The Beatles' Twist and Shout, inspiring the large crowd to join in dancing; Ferris also deceptively pretended to be Chicago's Sausage King Abe Froeman in order to dine at a Rush Street upscale restaurant
• at the end of his day off, Ferris, Jeanie, their mother, and Rooney all met up at the Bueller household at about the same time; with a change of heart, Jeanie covered for Ferris by scolding him for walking home from the hospital; she also reminded Rooney of his lost wallet and his confrontation with the family dog before Rooney was again chased off
• the rolling credits were prefaced by Ferris' repeat statement from his bedroom as he broke the fourth wall: ("Yep, I said it before and I'll say it again. Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it")
• in the film's rolling credits epilogue, the humiliated Rooney - completely defeated, dirtied, battered and disheveled - had to be picked up and ride in the back of a school bus full of students; he had illegally parked in front of the Buellers' home near a fire hydrant and his car had been towed
• his bespectacled, nerdy blonde seat-mate asked: "I bet you never smelled a real school-bus before," and then reached into her pocket and offered him a warm, melting red gummy bear: "A gummy bear? They've been in my pocket. They're real warm and soft"; he looked up and saw graffiti that read: "ROONEY EATS IT!!", and a notebook cover with a scrawled: "SAVE FERRIS"
• Ferris again appeared in his bathroom in the curtain-closing post-credits telling the audience (fourth wall) to leave: "You're still here? It's over! Go home. Go!"

A Fish Called Wanda (1988, UK/US)

• director Charles Crichton's funny madcap caper farce told about a London gang of double-crossing diamond thieves planning a heist of a jewelry store; the film's title reference to 'Wanda' was the name of a tropical angelfish pet, and the name of one of the main characters; the film's tagline was: "A TALE OF MURDER, LUST, GREED, REVENGE, AND SEAFOOD":
• two Americans involved in a diamond store heist caper were: lunatic ex-CIA hitman and unintelligent, shady "weapons man" and safecracker Otto West (Kevin Kline), and clever and seductive con artist and sexy jewel thief Wanda Gershwitz (Jamie Lee Curtis); the two partners Wanda and Otto claimed that they were a brother-sister team, but were actually lovers behind the back of robbery mastermind George Thomason (Tom Georgeson), who thought Wanda was his girlfriend; George shared an apartment at Kipling Mansions with his stuttering assistant, animal lover Ken Pile (Michael Palin)

Four Jewelry Heist Plotters
Wanda Gershwitz (Jamie Lee Curtis)	Otto West (Kevin Kline)
Ken Pile (Michael Palin)	George Thomason (Tom Georgeson)

• the heist sequence in London's Diamond House jewelry store (in the Hatton Garden commercial zone) was violent and brief; following the successful jewelry heist of 20 million pounds worth, the getaway limo driven by Ken nearly ran over an elderly lady while walking her three pet dogs, and George (not wearing his black ski-mask) in the front passenger seat was positively identified by her; the diamond loot was initially hidden in a rundown storeroom safe; the plan was for the group to rendezvous 72 hours later at Heathrow Airport to flee the country, but then double-crossing George returned and absconded with the stolen diamonds and hid them elsewhere (off-screen, in a locked safe deposit box somewhere), meanwhile, Wanda and Otto were planning to betray both George and Ken ("Cockney klutzes!"), seize the diamonds, and flee the country early; Otto was unaware that Wanda was also going to betray him
• after the exhilarating robbery, Wanda and Otto worked together to report George to the police; as George's apartment door was being pounded on by authorities, he hid the safe deposit box key in a plastic container of fish food and tossed it out the kitchen window into a planter; he was arrested and evidence was found from the crime scene (splinters of glass) on his pants leg
• the wily and seductive femme fatale Wanda developed a strategy that might help her cause to find the local of the hidden diamonds - to befriend George's conservative and stuffy British barrister Archie Leach (John Cleese), an unhappily-married lawyer in a loveless marriage to Wendy Leach (Maria Aitken)
• in George's and Ken's apartment, Wanda experienced complete sexual arousal, especially when she heard foreign languages, evidenced when Otto began speaking in Italian to her: "E molto pericoloso, signorina. Molto pericoloso. (she kissed him and he threw her on the bed) Carissima"; she burst out: "Speak it! Speak it!"; he continued: "Ossobuco milanese con piselli! Melanzane. Parmigiana con spinace!..." as he jumped on top of her and spread her legs
• meanwhile, Ken retrieved the fish food container (with the key) and returned to the apartment; he interrupted Wanda and Otto frolicking in the bedroom, and Wanda solely witnessed his hiding of the key in his tropical fish aquarium's 'treasure chest'; afterwards, when Ken was distracted by Otto pretending to be a homosexual to mislead him, Wanda snatched the key and put it in her own locket (engraved with 'W')
• in a line-up, George was identified by the elderly woman as the driver who nearly ran over her dogs; to learn more about George's case, and to possibly disrupt it by improperly speaking to Archie although she was a potential defense witness in the case, Wanda visited the barrister in his law office, kissed him, and propositioned him; shortly later, she assured him: "I don't want you for your conversation"
• in a clever cross-cutting sequence, two bedrooms were contrasted - the one where Otto was making passionate love to Wanda (he prefaced love-making by smelling his armpit and blowing up his boot - a disguised symbol of erection), and in the Leach's bedroom where Archie and his self-absorbed wife Wendy coldly undressed and paid no attention to each other
• throughout the remainder of the film, there were many failed attempts of stammering, animal-loving hitman Ken Pile who was ordered by George to assassinate old lady witness Mrs. Eileen Coady (Patricia Hayes); she was a threatening, matronly, key eye-witness to the diamond robbery; instead, Ken accidentally and cruelly killed her three cherished Yorkshire Terrier pet dogs instead (the first was mauled by an attack Doberman, the second was run-over and flattened by Ken disguised as a taxi driver, and the third was crushed by a falling safe)
• although Otto was extremely jealous and threatened the manipulative Wanda on her way to meet clandestinely with barrister Archie in his house: ("Touch his dick and he's dead!"), she was determined to get "friendly" with Archie; during their brief liaison, Archie called her: "the sexiest, most beautiful girl I have ever seen in my entire life," but Otto was listening in, interrupted, and again jealously insisted that Wanda not go all the way with him; Wanda realized that she had dropped her 'W' locket (with the key inside) on the floor, but then, they both had to sneak out of the house when Archie's wife Wendy Leach unexpectedly returned home; with the same first initial on the necklace locket, when Wendy viewed it, she assumed it was a gift from Archie for her

Archie's "What It's Like Being English" Speech

• during another secret rendezvous meeting at the vacant 2B apartment of a legal friend named Patrick Balfour (who was in Hong Kong), Archie painfully admitted his British stoicism to Wanda in a speech, explaining how he was cursed, before she agreed to be seduced, in order to help locate her locket: ("You make me feel free...Wanda, do you have any idea what it's like being English? Being so correct all the time, being so stifled by this dread of, of doing the wrong thing, of saying to someone, 'Are you married?' and hearing, ' My wife left me this morning,' or saying, uh, ' Do you have children?' and being told they all burned to death on Wednesday. You see, Wanda, we're all terrified of embarrassment. That's why we're so - dead. Most of my friends are dead, you know, we have these piles of corpses to dinner. But you're alive, God bless you, and I want to be, I'm so fed up with all this! I wanna make love with you, Wanda. I'm a good lover - at least, used to be, back in the early 14th century. Can we go to bed?"); she kissed him and answered 'Yeah', and they proceeded to the upstairs bedroom

Wanda Allowed Herself to be Seduced in Upstairs Bedroom

• during Wanda's love-making with Archie - she was spied upon by a very jealous Otto who was listening in and resented being called stupid: (Wanda: "He is so dumb...He thought that the Gettysburg Address was where Lincoln lived!...And when he heard your daughter's name was Portia, he said, 'Why did they name her after a car?'"); Otto heard Archie insinuate that he was stupid: (Archie: "How come a girl as bright as you could have a brother who's so...?")

Otto's Jealousy Toward Archie and Demand for an Apology

• Otto had heard enough and barged in to break up the couple, asserting: "Don't call me stupid!"; he demanded an apology from Archie and resorted to name-calling: "You pompous, stuck-up, snot-nosed, English, giant twerp scumbag, f--k-face dickhead asshole!"; Otto threateningly dangled Archie outside a 5th floor window to force a lengthy apology from him for calling him stupid: ("I apologize...I'm really, really sorry. I apologize unreservedly...I offer a complete and utter retraction. The imputation was totally without basis in fact, and was in no way fair comment, and was motivated purely by malice, and I deeply regret any distress that my comments may have caused you, or your family, and I hereby undertake not to repeat any such slander at any time in the future")
• Wanda objected to Otto's extreme jealousy toward Archie that she felt would jeopardize their ability to find the diamonds; Wanda delivered a scathing indictment of Otto's stupidity and continuing lack of intelligence after he again sensitively asserted: "Don't call me stupid": (Wanda: "Oh, right! To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people! I've known sheep that could outwit you. I've worn dresses with higher IQs. But you think you're an intellectual, don't you, ape?...Now let me correct you on a couple of things, OK? Aristotle was not Belgian. The central message of Buddhism is not 'every man for himself'. The London Underground is not a political movement. Those are all mistakes, Otto. I looked 'em up"); she reminded him about Archie: "You have just assaulted the one man who can keep you out of jail and make you rich"; she was able to get Otto to admit that he should "Apologize!"
• Otto drove to the Leach house to apologize, where he caught Archie stupidly burglarizing his own home (to acquire the locket); he responded by binding and knocking Archie out until he realized what he had done and fled; Wendy returned and untied Archie, who concealed the locket in his mouth (and then his pocket) and ran out of the house, not to miss another adulterous tryst opportunity with Wanda
• during another comical scene of lustful Archie with Wanda at the 2B apartment, Archie returned Wanda's locket (with the key), and then from the downstairs as he undressed, he spouted foreign phrases (in Italian and Russian) to an aroused Wanda in the upstairs; he was caught completely naked by an unsuspecting British family in what he thought was a perfect hideaway for having sex; he didn't know that his friend Patrick Balfour had rented out the apartment during his long absence; he was forced to use a strategically-placed framed photo to modestly hide himself; as he returned to the outside of his home, Otto intercepted him, offered a sincere apology, and gave Archie permission to have sex with Wanda ("Just go ahead. Pork away, pal. F--k her blue") - not knowing that Wendy was listening and learned about their adulterous encounters
• ultimately, the distress caused by the deaths of the elderly lady's pets caused her to have a fatal heart attack; Ken insanely laughed: "She copped it! I did it!"; sensing his imminent freedom, in jail, George was visited by Ken and gave him the go-ahead to purchase four plane tickets to Rio de Janiero that evening, then back to the flat to pack, pick up George, and get the diamonds loot in the safety deposit box at the Cathcart Towers Hotel near the airport before taking off from Heathrow bound for Rio

Otto's Torture of Ken: Gulping Down His Fish, Including His Favorite Tropical Pet Fish Wanda

• in a farcical scene inside Ken's and George's apartment flat, Otto tortured a bound-up and distressed Ken for the whereabouts of the stolen diamonds, while he was eating chips (with two fries stuck up Ken's nose) - and then scooping up and gulping down Ken's aquarium fish to add to his chips, including his favorite and beloved tropical pet fish (named WANDA) in front of him: ("Where are the diamonds?... There's plenty of time, Ken. I'll just sit here and eat my chips till you tell me. The English contribution to world cuisine - the chip! What do the English usually eat with chips to make them more interesting? Wait a moment! It's fish, isn't it? Down the hatch!")
• not knowing that Wanda had the key and still believing the key was in the aquarium's treasure chest, Ken confessed that the diamonds were in a safety deposit box at Cathcart Towers Hotel; Otto phoned Wanda for the safe deposit box key, and forced her to promise that in exchange for the key, the two of them would escape together with the loot to Rio de Janiero
• meanwhile, during George's trial, defense witness Wanda (as George's alleged lover) provided testimony that definitely incriminated George, and Archie let it slip that he had been unfaithful with Wanda (he called her "darling"); George attempted to attack Wanda and Archie, causing pandemonium and chaos in the courtroom; Archie's already-suspicious wife Wendy who was listening in the balcony approached, slapped Archie and threatened divorce ("You can stick this marriage right in your bottom!")
• with no other alternative but to go after the diamonds himself with Wanda, Archie drove off with her in his car to George's and Ken's flat to question Ken about their location, even though he knew she was sly and manipulative: "So, you robbed the jeweller's, turned one lover over to the police, kept one to help you find the diamonds, and when he does, you commit perjury"; Wanda gave him a reason to promise to take her to South America with him - she had the key to the safe deposit box
• Otto intercepted Wanda outside of the flat and took off with her in Archie's car to the airport, while Archie entered the flat and found Ken still tied up; as the excitable Ken stuttered furiously, Archie convinced him to wrote down the name of the airport hotel -- the Cathcart Towers; then, the two set off on Ken's moped to the airport
• at the airport hotel, Wanda and Otto quickly retrieved the diamonds from the safe deposit box at the Cathcart and acquired their British Airways tickets to Rio at the airport counter; on their way to Terminal 4 and Gate 14, Wanda double-crossed Otto by clubbing him over the head and locking him in a broom closet; Otto regained consciousness, shot his way out of the closet, stole a boarding pass from another passenger, and was about to set off for the plane; behind him, Archie caught up to Otto and confronted him with his own gun, although Otto was able to reacquire his own weapon, lead him onto the tarmac, and have Archie stand in a barrel of waste oil while humiliating and insulting him (and the British): "You're the filth of the planet. A bunch of pompous, badly-dressed, poverty-stricken, sexually-repressed football hooligans"
• the vengeful Ken also arrived after being conveyed down the luggage chute - he was spotted driving a steamroller toward them; Otto further taunted Ken ("It's K-k-k-ken c-c-coming to k-k-k-kill me!") before backing up and accidentally planting his two feet into fresh cement and becoming stuck; Ken ran over Otto and flattened him; due to his tremendous joy, Ken realized he had been cured of his stutter: ("'K-k-k-k-Ken.' You bastard. Hey, I've lost my stutter. It's gone. I can speak. How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"), but found himself about to be arrested; it was revealed that Archie had run onto the plane to join Wanda, and the miraculously-alive Otto appeared briefly clinging to their plane window, but was unable to hold on during take-off
• in the film's epilogue, it highlighted the futures of the cast members: "Archie and Wanda were married in Rio, had seventeen children, and founded a leper colony. Ken became Master of Ceremonies at the London Sea World. Otto emigrated to South Africa and became Minister for Justice"

Five Easy Pieces (1970)

• director Bob Rafelson's intriguing character study and road film appeared during the New Wave age, and told about a disaffected, frustrated male seeking his identity
• at a roadside cafe-diner, in the film's most memorable scene, an impatient Robert Dupea (Jack Nicholson) got into a frustrating fight with a strict, rude and surly waitress (Lorna Thayer) (who allowed 'no substitutions') over his initial side order of wheat toast - to bypass her rules about menu substitutions, Robert's order quickly became a chicken-salad sandwich order with toasted wheat bread but without the chicken, lettuce and mayo: ("You make sandwiches, don't you?...You've got bread and a toaster of some kind?"...OK, I'll make it as easy for you as I can. I'd like an omelette, plain, and a chicken salad sandwich on wheat toast. No mayonnaise, no butter, no lettuce, and a cup of coffee...Yeah. Now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast, give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich, and you haven't broken any rules"); he also added a further sneering challenge: "I want you to hold it (the chicken) between your knees" and then after telling her: "You see this sign?", he cleared the table with one swipe of his arm - of all the water glasses, place-mats, cutlery and menus

Forbidden Planet (1956)

• director Fred Wilcox' influential, classic science-fiction space adventure included one unique character named Robby the Robot (voice by Marvin Miller) - the first celebrity robot; although some promotional materials for the film portrayed Robby as a monstrous creature who kidnapped the film's sole female, in reality, Robby always acted benevolently and intelligently - with a sprinkling of humor
• in the 23rd century, upon the arrival of a group of astronauts on a flying saucer-shaped United Planets space cruiser C-57D to a distant planet-star named Altair-IV with green skies, they were greeted by a fast-moving Jeep-like vehicle driven by a large bi-pedal robot with a round torso, about 7 and a half feet tall; the astronauts met the friendly anthropomorphic Robby the Robot (who was the influential progenitor of many other future robotic creations); he functioned as both a house servant and guard
• Robby had a cone-shaped, clear-domed and jukebox-like head (with twirling lights and rotating motorized antenna ears), a lighted chest panel, gripping hands (with thumb and two fingers), bulbous segmented legs, and a pot-belly stove-shaped body; Robby stood at 7' 6" tall, and had a charming personality
• in their first confrontation together, he advised the visitors from Earth: "If you do not speak English, I am at your disposal with 187 other languages along with their various dialects and sub-tongues"; the commander asked stupidly, in an unintentionally hysterical line: "Er, this is of no offense, but you are a robot, aren't you?"; he formally introduced himself: "For your convenience, I am monitored to respond to the name Robby"; when the commanding astronaut mentioned the planet's high oxygen content ("Nice climate you have here. High oxygen content"), Robby replied with a smug but witty sense of humor: "I rarely use it myself, sir. It promotes rust"; Robby also clarified after a question about his gender: "In my case, sir, the question is totally without meaning"
• later, in another case of comic relief, when Robby arrived late, he gave a humorous excuse: ("Sorry miss, I was giving myself an oil job!"); on another occasion, he stated: "Quiet please. I am analyzing"

Forrest Gump (1994)

• Robert Zemeckis' Best Picture-winning, sentimental tearjerker comedy, with a floating feather motif, told of a disabled, slow-witted, but kind-hearted and wholesome individual who had brushes with greatness (by being present at many memorable and iconic historical moments in the last half of the 20th century) and became a folk hero, but also felt heartache throughout his life
• the computerized special-effects of CGI and imaging put intellectually-challenged Forrest Gump (Tom Hanks) into comedic situations with vintage historical events seen in archival film footage:
  • Gov. George Wallace's stand-off in Little Rock, AK at the Univ. of Alabama against school integration in June of 1963, known as "The Stand in the Schoolhouse Door" - with Forrest observing in the crowd
  • Forrest's meeting with President JFK in the White House as part of the All-American Univ. of Alabama football team, when Forrest nervously stated: "I gotta pee"
  • Forrest's reception of the Congressional Medal of Honor for heroism in the Vietnam War during an awards ceremony with President LBJ, who stated: "I'd like to see that" when Forrest mentioned his buttocks-wound, and he obliged by pulling his pants down
  • he appeared on The Dick Cavett Show to speak about his China experiences with the US ping-pong team, sharing a guest appearance with Beatles' singer John Lennon, that purportedly helped to inspire the song "Imagine" (by repeating quotes from the song's future lyrics)
  • as a representative of the US Table Tennis team, Forrest was also honored to meet President Richard Nixon, who recommended a stay at the infamous Watergate Hotel - where Forrest unwittingly reported the break-in that ultimately led to Nixon's resignation in 1974

On The Dick Cavett Show With John Lennon

Forrest's Meeting with President Nixon

Four Weddings and a Funeral (1994, UK)

In Mike Newell's surprise R-rated British hit, a romantic comedy with explicit language and content, it told about an on-again/off-again romance between a British bachelor and an American female - who often met at weddings (and one funeral):

• in the opening scene set in London on May 1st, witty and charming 32 year-old bachelor Charles (Hugh Grant) and his quirky, tone-deaf roommate Scarlett (Charlotte Coleman) woke up in their shared apartment, and accompanied by a barrage of many F-words, the two realized that they had overslept and were late to a wedding - an habitual practice; they raced in Scarlett's slow 40 mph car to St. John's Church in Somerset, England for the wedding, arriving just in time

Charles (Hugh Grant)	American Journalist Caroline "Carrie" (Andie MacDowell)	Matthew (John Hannah)
Scarlett (Charlotte Coleman)	Fiona (Kristin Scott Thomas)	Gareth (Simon Callow)

• the film's 'first' wedding was between Angus (Timothy Walker) and Laura (Sara Crowe), with Charles serving as best man (but he had forgotten the ring!); two of the attendees were the highly-energetic, gregarious Gareth (Simon Callow) and Matthew (John Hannah), two loyal and committed gay partners
• after the service in the church garden, Charles was warned by his ascerbic, jealous, wealthy, long-time friend Fiona (Kristin Scott Thomas) about one of the attendees wearing a very wide-brimmed black hat - an American journalist and fashion editor named Caroline "Carrie" (Andie MacDowell) - "Slut...Used to work at Vogue. Lives in America now. Only gets out with very glamorous people. Quite out of your league"
• under one of the outdoor tents, Fiona spoke with trainee-vicar Father Gerald (Rowan Atkinson) who was nervous about conducting services in the future; Fiona observed how the recent ceremony was like sex: "Rather like the first time one has sex...Though rather less messy, of course, and far less call for condoms"
• during the post-ceremony dinner, the bumbling Charles spoke to the gathered audience and stated how it was his second time to be best man; during a funny speech, he added that it was unfortunate that his previous time, the couple divorced after a disastrous two days; he then drunkenly added for the current couple: "I am, as ever, in bewildered awe of anyone who makes this kind of commitment that Angus and Laura have made today. I know I couldn't do it and I think it's wonderful they can"; he then proposed a toast for "the adorable couple"; the spirited Gareth joined the newlyweds on the dance floor for some outrageous moves; Charles kept staring at the American Carrie, and Matthew questioned if it was "love at first sight"
• meanwhile, bridesmaid Lydia (Sophie Thompson) was depressed and upset about the lack of attention she had received: "I was promised sex. Everybody said it. 'You'll be a bridesmaid, you'll get sex, you'll be fighting 'em off.' But not so much as a tongue in sight"; Bernard (David Haig) suggested: "Well, I mean, if you fancy anything, I could always...," but she declined: "Oh, don't be ridiculous, Bernard. I'm not that desperate"; however, as everything was winding down, the couple were seen passionately kissing as people slowly departed
• afterwards, Charles changed his overnight plans and met up with the elusive, pretty and unique American Carrie in her Room 12 accommodations at The Lucky Boatman pub; she invited him in: "Well, why don't you come in and skulk for a while"; she flirtatiously spoke about how they were faced with deciding to have sex or not: ("So I noticed the bride and groom didn't kiss in the church which is kind of strange. Where I come from, kissing is very big...I always worry I'll go too far, you know, in the heat of the moment"); Charles asked: "How far do you think too far would be, then?"; she offered him different kinds of kisses to measure their intimacy; she gave him an innocent peck on the cheek, and then a kiss on the lips ("Maybe this would be better"); Charles remarked: ("I think it would be dangerous to take it any further"), but then after another very passionate kiss, he added: ("That might be taking it a little far")
• as the two removed each other's clothes to have sex, Charles thought that they were at the "honeymoon" stage: ("This kind of thing is really better suited to the honeymoon than to the service itself"); then, he answered Carrie's question about the reason for the term 'honeymoon': "I suppose it's, uh, 'honey' because it's sweet as honey, and 'moon' because it's the first time a husband got to see his wife's bottom"; the two slept together (an uncommitted, one night stand or tryst)
• the next morning, Carrie played a trick on Charles by asking: ("Just before I go, when were you thinking of announcing the engagement?...Ours. I assumed since we slept together and everything, we'd be getting married") - but then he realized that she was joking - and he expressed profound relief: ("God! For a moment there, I thought I was in Fatal Attraction. I thought you were Glenn Close and I was gonna get home and find my pet rabbit on the stove"); she confided: "I think we both missed a great opportunity here"; Carrie surprised Charles by telling him that she was leaving and returning to America
• three months later in London, the 'second' of the film's four weddings was between Bernard and Lydia; again, Charles and Scarlett were late and had to run all the way to the church; the service was officiated by nervous trainee-vicar Father Gerald; in the film's most hilarious sequence, the confused, inept, fumbling, malaprop-spouting Father Gerald mixed up their names as he recited the vows for the "awful-wedded" marital couple, including saying "Holy Goat" and "Holy Spigot" instead of "Holy Ghost or Spirit"

The 'Second' Wedding: Bernard and Lydia

Hilarious Wedding Vows Scene With Father Gerald (Rowan Atkinson)

• at this 'second' wedding, the charming (and engaged!) Carrie introduced Charles to her older, snobbish Scottish fiancee Hamish Banks (Corin Redgrave); immediately depressed, Charles mentioned to Matthew how he was forever a bachelor: "Why am I always at, uh, weddings, and never actually getting married, Matt?...Maybe it's me"; during the post-wedding dinner, Fiona confessed to a nosy seat mate at her table, that she had always been secretly in love with Charles: 'The truth is, I have met the right person, only he's not in love with me. Until I stop loving him, no one stands a chance"
• the commitment-phobic Charles realized he was in the midst of a predicament, seated at a wedding table where tales were told about his ex-girlfriends, and he squirmed and cringed while listening to their recollections: "I seem to be stuck in the wedding from hell, ghosts of girlfriends past at every turn. Next thing you know, I'll bump into Henrietta and the horror will be complete" - and then Henrietta (Anna Chancellor) appeared; Charles retreated to one of the nearby rooms, and hid when the sex-crazed married couple entered; he was tortured by the sounds of their vigorous sex on a bed
• elsewhere concealed under a table while others danced, Scarlett spoke to one of the young bridesmaids, and complained about not having a boyfriend: "Because most of the blokes I fancy think l'm stupid and pointless - and, so, they just bonk me and then leave me. And the kind of blokes that do fancy me, I think are drips. I can't even be bothered to bonk them. Which does sort of leave me a bit nowhere"; she defined 'bonking' for the young girl: "Well, it's kind of like table tennis, only with slightly smaller balls"
• Charles found himself cornered by a very clingy Henrietta, who labeled him as a commitment-phobe and explained how he was in "real trouble:" ("You're sort of turning into a kind of serial monogamist. One girl after another, yet you'll never love anyone, because you never let them near you")
• although Carrie was engaged and Charles thought the couple had departed by taxi, Carrie returned explaining that only her fiancee had departed for Scotland; she asked: "Keep me company?"; she reluctantly but eagerly agreed to have a night-cap with Charles at her hotel, and joked: "I think we can risk it. I'm pretty sure I can resist you. You're not that cute," but then spent the night with him
• one month later, he awoke and remarked to Scarlett: "I'm taking advantage of the fact that for the first time in my entire life, it's Saturday and I don't have a wedding to go to"; to his shock, Charles received an invitation to Carrie's wedding in Scotland; while gift-shopping at her expensive registry store, he happened to meet Carrie who suggested: "Just get me an ashtray"; she asked for his advice for an "important decision" she had to make: "Are you free for about a half-hour?" - the selection of her wedding dress; she modeled a varied selection of dresses for him
• afterwards at a cafe-pub, she discussed her prolific sexual history with Charles, and hilariously recounted her experiences with a total of 33 sexual partners; her 6th encounter was when she was 17 years old; partners 12-17 were during her university years; her 32nd partner ("was lovely") - and then she revealed that Charles was actually # 32 (one before her fiancee), after which she summarized her recounting: ("...So there you go, less than Madonna, more than Princess Di - I hope. And, how about you? How many have you slept with?")

Modeling Wedding Dresses For Charles

At a Pub With Charles, Carrie Discussing Her Promiscuous Sexual History

Charles' Hesitant "I Think I Love You" Declaration of Love to Carrie

• outside, Charles nervously ran after Carrie, and hesitantly declared his 'romantic' love for the about-to-be-married female; stuttering, he referenced David Cassidy's song: "I Think I Love You": ("Uhm, look. Sorry, sorry. Uh, I just, uhm, well, this is a really stupid question and, uhm, particularly in view of our recent shopping excursion, but, uh, I just wondered, if by any chance, uhm, ah, I mean obviously not because I am just some git who's only slept with nine people, but-but I-I just wondered...uhh. I really feel, umm...in short, to recap in a slightly clearer version, uh, in the words of David Cassidy in fact, uhm, while he was still with the Partridge Family, uh, 'I think I love you,' and uh, I-I, uh, just wondered by any chance, you wouldn't like to... Umm...Uh...Uh...No, no, no, of course not...Uhm, I'm an idiot, ha, he's not... Excellent, excellent, fantastic...lovely to see you, sorry to disturb...Better get on..."; she responded: "That was very romantic," and he continued: "Well, I thought it over a lot, you know, I wanted to get it just right. Important to have said it, I think...Said, uh, you know, what I, what I just said about, uh, David Cassidy") - she kissed him on the cheek: "You're lovely", but then walked off and left him standing alone
• one month later, the film's 'third' wedding was set in Perthshire, Scotland (at the Glenthrist Castle's Chapel), where Carrie married Scotsman Hamish Banks; as usual, Charles arrived late; after hearing the recitement of vows, Charles muttered to himself: "F--k-a-doodle-doo"; after the ceremony, Gareth observed: "It's Brigadoon! It's Bloody Brigadoon!"; he also encouraged everyone else: "Tonight, these are your orders: Go forth and conjugate. Find husbands and wives"; Scarlett met a tall Texan named Chester (Randall Paul), and Fiona told a stunned Charles of her unrequited love for him: ("I've been in love with the same bloke for ages....You, Charlie. It's always been you. Since first we met, oh so many years ago. I knew the first moment. Across a crowded room. Or lawn, in fact. Doesn't matter. There's nothing either of us can do. Such is life. Friends isn't bad, you know? Friends is quite something")
• suddenly, during a toast by Hamish, Gareth collapsed onto the floor and died of a heart-attack, presumably after some vigorous dancing, and the wedding celebration ended
• at a moving funeral ceremony - the film's acting highlight was Matthew's words of remembrance for "jolly" and "splendid bugger" Gareth, Matthew's gay partner: ("I hope joyful is how you will remember him. Not stuck in a box in a church"), followed by his poignant reading of W. H. Auden's Funeral Blues at the memorial service for: ("Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone, Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone, Silence the pianos and with muffled drum, Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come. Let the aeroplanes circle, moaning overhead, Scribbling on the sky the message: He is Dead. Put crepe bows 'round the white necks of the public doves, Let traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves. He was my North, my South, my East and West. My working week and my Sunday rest. My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song. I thought that love would last forever: I was wrong. The stars are not wanted now, put out every one. Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun. Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood, For nothing now can ever come to any good.")

Matthew's Reading at Funeral For His Gay Partner Gareth

• ten months later in the final scene - the film's 'fourth' wedding, Charles had announced he was tying the knot with Henrietta at St. Julian's in Smithfield (London); Charles was fooled by his friends into thinking that he was late for his own wedding with "Duckface" (Henrietta's nickname by Fiona); after Charles noticed Carrie was in attendance, she informed him that she had separated from the older Hamish after a brief marriage of only a few months: ("He wasn't the man for me after all....We left each other"); they both realized that the timing was awful, and as he was about to approach the altar, Charles began swearing ("Bugger, bugger!"), changed his mind and sought to delay the proceedings
• during the ceremony at the altar when the priest asked if there were any objections, Charles' deaf younger brother David (David Bower) expressed, in sign language, that Charles was in doubt and loved someone else: ("I suspect the groom is having doubts. I suspect the groom would like to delay. I suspect the groom loves someone else"); Charles assented to the priest: "I do"; reacting to the rejection with rage (Get out of my way! Let me kill him!"), Charles' bride Henrietta punched him in the face to end the ceremony
• shortly later outside Charles' home, Carrie arrived in the rain to apologize for causing a disruption in Charles' marriage; Charles admitted: "Marriage and me - we're very clearly not meant for one another"; he was finally able to declare his utter and true love for Carrie in the rain: (Charles: "There I was, standing there in the church, and for the first time in my whole life, I realized I totally and utterly loved one person. And it wasn't the person standing next to me in the veil. It's the person standing opposite me now - in the rain"; Carrie: "Is it still raining? I hadn't noticed"); and then awkwardly, he did not ask for her hand in marriage: ("But first, let me ask you one thing. Do you think, after we've dried off, after we've spent lots more time together, you might agree not to marry me? And do you think not being married to me might maybe be something you could consider doing for the rest of your life? Do you?") - Carrie's response: "I do," was accompanied by a kiss, and the camera rose into the air to capture a lightning bolt in the cloudy sky
• in the film's final image (in the ending slide-show montage of various new marital couplings - future weddings), Fiona was with a very surprising groom - Prince Charles! - to the tune of "Going to the Chapel"

The Full Monty (1997, UK)

• director Peter Cattaneo's international buddy film - a British, working-class comedic drama with music and very quirky characters, was set in the 1990s in the northern British industrial steel city of Sheffield (South Yorkshire) where the steel industry and its steel mills were devastated - a far cry from 25 years earlier seen in a promotional film; in the rags-to-riches tale, a small group of desperate, bored and poor manual laborers who lost work six months earlier in closed steel plants reclaimed their lives by creatively using their bodies to acquire income; its taglines were: "The year's most revealing comedy" and "Six men. With nothing to lose. Who dare to go....THE FULL MONTY"
• in the film's opening, two ex-steel workers were introduced: divorced but determined Gary "Gaz" Schofield (Robert Carlyle) and his overweight, heavy-set, body self-conscious best friend Dave Horsfall (Mark Addy) with low self-esteem; both lost their jobs and were on government assistance (the dole); Gaz's estranged 12 year-old son Nathan (William Snape) often reluctantly tagged along with his father; despairing of their financial situations, to earn extra money, they resorted to robbing a steel girder as scrap metal from the closed mills

Gary "Gaz" Schofield (Robert Carlyle)

Dave Horsfall (Mark Addy)

• outside a local men's club known as the Millthorpe, "Gaz" found that the establishment had a long line (or queue) of women waiting outside (for its "females only" night on May 4th) and paying an expensive cover charge of 10 quid for a one-time striptease show featuring a touring, exotic male stripper Chippendale-like group; while Gaz was hiding in the club's GENTS room during the show, a trio of women charged in (to avoid the queue at the ladies' room), and Gaz was aghast looking through the toilet stall door noticing that one female tart had pulled up her skirt and lowered her pants and was urinating against a wall; he kept it a secret that Dave's wife Jean (Lesley Sharp) was one of the three
• "Gaz" was faced with losing visitation rights with his son Nathan if he couldn't afford child support payments to his ex-wife Mandy (Emily Woof) (and her new boyfriend Barry (Paul Butterworth)); and Dave feared losing his wife Jean due to his sexual impotency and severe body-image issues
• Gaz set about to devise his own low-rent group of male strippers in a profitable, get-rich-quick scheme for his group of unemployed friends to make money, although he feared their less-than-perfect, flawed and average bodies would be a turn-off
• there were two other ex-steel worker participants who were recruited into the crazy plan to join "Gaz" and Dave - the first individual was depressed and suicidal mill security guard Lomper (Steve Huison) (who cared for his elderly mother); he was saved and prevented from killing himself in his exhaust-filled car, before being chosen to be a member of the strip act
• the next person to be recruited - the uptight, snobbish, middle-aged Gerald who had already been introduced at the Job Centre, was discovered dancing with his wife Linda (Deirdre Costello) in an amateur ballroom dance evening class; he was trying to keep his six months' unemployment a secret from his credit-card obsessed spendthrift wife; he was also highly skeptical of the dancing skill and talent of his former steel workers: "Dancers have coordination, skill, timing, fitness, and grace. Take a long, hard look in the mirror," but reluctantly accepted their offer to be the group's dance instructor
• a stripper audition was held in an empty warehouse to add more members; the first auditioner Reg (Bruce Jones) fumbled removing his pants and was eliminated; next was elderly Barrington "Horse" Mitchell (Paul Barber) who had a "dodgy hip," but claimed he was knowledgeable about earlier-era dance moves (the Bump, the Stomp, the Bus Stop, and the Funky Chicken) and then added: "Me break dancing days are probably over"; he impressed the judges with his spirited dancing to Wilson Pickett's "Land of a Thousand Dances"
• when uncoordinated candidate Guy (Hugo Speer) (who claimed he loved Singin' in the Rain (1952), especially the scene of Donald O'Connor running up a wall during the song "Make 'Em Laugh") was asked by Gaz in the panel of judges: "You don't sing....You don't dance....Hope you don't think I'm being nosy, but, uh, what do you do?"; to answer, he dropped his pants and Gaz observed: "Gentleman, the lunch box has landed"; Guy was immediately selected for his anatomical large endowment
• during hilarious practice rehearsals, to the tunes of Donna Summer's "Hot Stuff" and "The Stripper," the clutzy would-be dancers worked on their bump and grind act with Gerald as their instructor; they practiced one day inside Gerald's home - stripping down to their underwear
• believing that his father would pay him back, Nathan lent his father £100 from his savings in order to reserve and book the local club for their show
• "Gaz" spread the news that their show for women only, dubbed "Hot Metal", would be unique by going "the full monty" (or complete nudity "with their widges hanging out" - "widges on parade") - "We've gotta give them more than your average ten-bob stripper"
• in the film's famous short dole queue scene at the Job Centre - a Chippendales-style, feel-good moment - the unemployed working-class men from the Sheffield mill factory heard Donna Summer's 70s disco hit Hot Stuff on the radio and rhythmically started moving, unable to resist the beat - they first slowly shifted in place, moving one body part at a time, until they were fully dancing in unison; Gaz was fully amused

Job Centre Line-Dancing

• Dave expressed further concerns about his out-of-shape figure: ("I mean, what if next Friday, 400 women turn around and say: 'He's too fat, he's too old, and he's a pigeon-chested little tosser. What happens then, eh?...Bullocks to your personality. This is what they're looking at, right?. And I tell you summat, mates. Anti-wrinkle cream there may be, but anti-fat-bastard cream, there is none")
• Gerald worried privately with Dave about stripping and having an erection; he recalled his youth at coed swimming lessons when he acquired a "stiffy" viewing "the pretty lassies around in bikinis"; due to his own body-image issues, Dave dropped out briefly and found employment as a security guard at a British supermarket chain (Asda); plans for the strip show were in jeopardy
• just before their Friday performance, the strip dancers held a public dress rehearsal on Tuesday for four of Horse's family members, including his mother who was knitting (and attempted to stifle her laughter), but were caught and arrested for indecent exposure; wearing thong underwear, Lomper and Guy escaped to Lomper's house, and found themselves staring fondly at each other
• as a result of their arrest, the group became front-page news: ("STEEL STRIPPERS EXPOSED - Child found as police raid uncovers naked dance gang"), and they also learned that their show had sold 200 tickets, amounting to "two grand"; the entire group of six dancers was persuaded to perform for one-night only
• in the uplighting finale, the night of their act, Nathan ordered his reluctant father Gaz to join the five others on stage - and to perform for the mixed audience; Dave announced to the cheering crowd: "We may not be young, we may not be pretty, we may not be right good, but we're here. We're live, and for one night only, we're going for the full monty!"

Bumpin' and Grindin'

• the stripper group restored their dignity and amusingly stripped on-stage during a rendition of Tom Jones' "You Can Leave Your Hat On," as they went "the full monty" - they quickly transitioned from dark blue uniforms to skimpy red-leather G-string thongs; then they removed their underwear to the delight of many screaming female fans including Dave's wife Jean and Gaz's ex-wife Mandy in the audience (who changed from being vindictive to being accepting), and covered their privates with their hats - the last remaining article of clothing. They only displayed their nude cheek bottoms when they were viewed from the rear. The image froze on the group when they tossed away their hats - seen from behind as they revealed all.

Funny Girl (1968)

• director William Wyler's highly-fictionalized musical biography was about the famed, early 20th century Ziegfeld Follies revue performer Fanny Brice (Best Actress-winning Barbra Streisand) - she was both a comedienne and film star; the tale was mostly told in flashback
• at Fanny's opening night performance in Ziegfeld's "Follies" at the New Amsterdam Theatre, the dramatic, lavish wedding-song finale "His Love Makes Me Beautiful" was marvelously staged with a staircase of beautiful, scantily-clad, bejewelled Ziegfeld Girls; she unexpectedly transformed the scene of idealized beauty into a brilliant comedic performance by appearing on-stage as a pregnant bride ("in the family way") with a pillow stuffed under her wedding gown
• the audience broke out into unexpected laugher, and initially there were stunned reactions to her subversion of the romantic lyrics by the outraged Florenz Ziegfeld (Walter Pidgeon) himself, but ultimately he accepted her decision when she explained why she had abruptly changed the mood of the song with a comic twist: ("They laughed with me, not at me. Because I wanted them to laugh")
• to her surprise, Ziegfeld congratulated her and the cast: ("It went beautifully") rather than firing her: ("I ought to fire you. But I love talent. And it's hard to quarrel with five curtain calls...So I guess I'll have to give you another chance"); he even ordered her to replicate the opening night's performance: ("You'll do it exactly as you did tonight and that's an order!") with the pillow; he even offered her a third number and new song; Fanny's intuition would prove to bring her lasting attention and fame